Stupid Onion Story

An article that appeared in the Chicago Tribune last week.

Man Hits Wife in Head With an Onion

DES MOINES, Iowa – A man was arrested after he hit his wife in the back of the head with an onion. James Izzolena, 54, of Des Moines, had been drinking, became upset with his wife, Nicole Izzolena, 27, and threw an onion at her during an argument on Wednesday, police said.

Police said James Izzolena admitted throwing the onion at his wife but said he didn’t mean to hit her.

His wife told police it made her head hurt.

Many layers of stupidity.

Wife. Marrying a man twice your age and not expecting an onion to be tossed your way or worse.

Husband. For ruining a perfectly good vegetable.

Police. For arresting the man (unless there is a history of abuse not mentioned anywhere in the article.)

Associated Press. For writing and distributing this story. Just because you can does not mean you should.

Chicago Tribune. For wasting valuable newsprint on something so inane.

About 48facets
What you read is what you get.

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